They say cooking is a simple deed
A good book of recipes is all you need
i have one.
fat lot of good its done.
My food still tastes like fermented sea weed
I remember when mom did the cooking...ah, happy days of yore!
Now my lunches are a study in gore
Battered and burned
All that I've learned
Is cooking is much more than your average household chore.
Even more than an art - it is a battle of the nerve
Between you and the chicken you are trying to serve
It rises from the dead
And conspires with the bread
To get the vengeance all its forefathers did deserve
I follow each recipe down to the letter
In the vain hope that this time the outcome will be better
But the instructions get jumbled
My fingers get fumbled
And my tummy just keeps getting upsetter.
Restaurants could have saved me, but my wallet aint got dough.
And after a while my tummy gives instant food a "NO GO"
Almost about to starve to death
I appeal to you with my one last breath...
If you can cook, please let me know
